Oh My Gas
by Jgirl7777
Summary: Summary: Alvin has some very bad gas! Suck-ish summary; funny story. (80's version)


_**Oh My Gas!**_

"J should be here any moment" Dave said.

"How long will you be gone?" Theodore asked his father.

"Not long" Dave replied "J will only stay one night."

All of the sudden, Alvin cut the cheese.

Everyone covered their noses.

"Gross, Alvin!" Theodore squeaked.

Alvin just laughed.

"What? I thought farting is a natural thing" Alvin stated.

"Yeah, but still!" Simon argued.

"I need you to be good for her" he told them "And don't do what Alvin just did; girls don't like it."

"Of course" Simon replied.

"Because I know everything that happened last time" Dave stated.

"I didn't mean to knock her out, Dave" Alvin says.

"I know. And the best thing is she didn't quit" Dave said.

"I'm so excited!" Theodore exclaimed.

"Yeah, J is an amazing babysitter!" Simon added.

"She's fun, and nice, and hot, and-" Alvin was interrupted.

"And way too old for you" a familiar voice said.

The boys turned around.

"J!" They exclaimed and went to hug her.

Alvin was blushing.

"You know I-I didn't mean it like you heard it, right?" He asked.

"I know. You like Brittany" J responded, but Alvin just blushed deeper.

J laughed.

"Well, I should really get going" Dave said and hugged the boys goodbye.

"Bye Dave!" The boys called as he left.

J closed the door.

"Where have you been?" Theodore asked "We missed you!"

"I missed you too. But I am a busy girl" J told him.

"Who wants to watch a movie?" she asked them.

All paws went up.

"Alright, C'mon" J says and they sat down to watch a movie.

A few minutes in, Alvin farted very loud.

"Really?!" Simon said, who was sitting right next to him.

"What was that? An earth quake?" J asked "Or maybe Alvin ate something spicy for lunch?"

She poked his belly.

Alvin giggled.

"Sorry. I had tacos" he replied.

"That explains it" J rolled her eyes.

* * *

After the movie, J decided to make dinner.

The chipmunks set the table while J made hot dogs and mac 'n' cheese.

They enjoyed their dinner until Alvin squeaked one out.

The others covered their noses and coughed.

"Wow, Alvin. You should win an award for that!" J said, coughing as her eyes began to water.

"That was rude, Alvin!" Simon scolded.

"It slipped" Alvin merely shrugged.

"One more and we'll have to evacuate the house!" Theodore says.

"It's not like we're dining with the queen" Alvin retorted in an English accent.

"No, your dining with J and Dave said not to pass gas in front of her. You only embarrassing yourself." Simon said.

Both brothers glared at each other.

"Boy, boys, settle down" J spoke up.

"Yes, J" Simon responded.

Alvin smirked.

He went over to Simon and farted in his face.

"ALVIN!" Simon shouted, his eyes watering.

Alvin snickered and sat back down.

"That was just nasty! Alvin, if you're trying to peeve me off, it's working" Simon pulled his shirt over his nose.

"J, Can I sit with you? This chair hasta be burned!" Simon asked and J laughed.

"Sure. C'mere, babe" J said and offered to share her seat with him.

Simon moved his plate to the other side of the table and sat next to J.

He knew J was a 'safe spot' from Alvin; he wouldn't dare try anything if J was there.

Alvin farted again, so loud it could've shook the house.

"You should change your underwear, Alvin" Theodore chuckled.

"Maybe I should start calling you _dirty_ boxer shorts!" J laughed.

"I'm surprised you haven't pooped your pants" Simon added.

Everyone laughed.

Alvin stopped laughing and had a feeling of discomfort.

"Alvin, you alright?" J asked.

"I don't feel good. Can I be excused?" Says Alvin.

"Sure, baby. Go up to your room and lie down. I'll be up there in a minute, okay?" J responds.

Alvin nodded and left the table.

The others looked at each other.

* * *

After everything was cleaned up in the kitchen, Simon, Theodore, and J went upstairs.

They entered the room to find Alvin on his side, clutching his stomach.

"Get ready for bed; I'll take care of Alvin" J said and they did as they were told.

She sat beside Alvin and gently stroked his head.

Alvin relaxed himself slightly and smiled at her.

"That feels nice" Alvin said, closing his eyes.

"Everyone loves it" J replied.

"Can you tell me what's wrong?" She asked him.

"I-I don't feel good" Alvin told her.

"I know that, baby, but what hurts?" J wanted to know.

"My tummy hurts… Really bad" Alvin moaned.

"Awe, okay. Get your pajamas on while I get some warm water" J told him and he nodded.

Alvin was in his pajamas in his bed, holding his aching stomach.

"Alright, I got the warm water and my hooty" J said.

"What's a hooty?" Alvin asked.

"It's a heating pad but it's an owl stuffed animal" J explained "when my tummy hurt when I was young, my grandma would give me this little guy right here."

"Oh" Alvin said.

J placed the hooty under Alvin's shirt.

He sat up so he could drink the water.

J tucked the other boys into their beds and gave them goodnight kisses.

They fell asleep within minutes.

Then she went back to Alvin.

"Do you feel any better?" she asked him and he shook his head.

"All the water's gone and the hooty thing isn't hot anymore and I still have a tummy ache!" Alvin whined.

J sat on the bed.

"You're probably just really gassy, baby" J noted.

"Can you rub my tummy like Dave?" Alvin asked.

"Alright, but only for little while. You need to go to bed" J replied.

Alvin guided J's hand to where hurt.

"Here" he said.

J gently rubbed his stomach.

Alvin enjoyed it and made small, joyful sounds every once in a while.

Alvin huddled close and J cradled him, continuing to rub him.

"Do you need to go potty?" J asked.

"No" Alvin responded weakly.

"Can you try?" she asked.

"Why?" Alvin asked in a whiny voice.

"Cuz, maybe if you empty your load, you'll feel better" J suggested.

"I don't wanna right now. I want to stay here with you and your nice rubbies"

Alvin gave a weak chuckle.

"I'll rub you after. C'mon" J said.

She carried him to the bathroom.

"But I don't have to" Alvin told her as she set him down near the door.

"Just try" J replied.

Alvin shrugged and went in, closing the door behind him.

As soon as Alvin sat on the toilet, it was like continuous bullets shot into it.

Alvin clasped his stomach as tears filled his eyes.

"Oh, munk!" he cried.

J could hear from the outside.

"Baby, are you okay?" J asked him.

There was no answer at first; Alvin was too embarrassed and in pain.

"Um, y-yeah" he finally responded.

J could hear him blushing after the delayed response.

* * *

About ten minutes later, Alvin came out of the bathroom.

"You alright, boxer shorts?" J asked.

Alvin nodded and held up his arms for her to pick him up.

She carried him to bed.

"Do you feel better now?" J asked.

"Yeah" Alvin replied softly, his cheeks growing red.

J laughed and held him close.

"Bedtime" J said and laid him down.

"Awe, but…" Alvin tried.

"Alright, I'll hold you for just a little longer" J said and he smiled.

She cradled the chipmunk and laid on his bed, gently rubbing him to sleep.

Soon she fell asleep too.

* * *

In the middle of the night, Alvin passed gas in J's direction.

She was caught in the Dutch oven.

J coughed and threw the covers off them.

"Oh my God!"

She fell off the bed, gasping for fresh air.

Everyone woke up.

"J? What's wrong?" Simon asked as they ran to her.

"Dutch… O-Oven" J responded, her eyes tearing up.

"I thought you were dying!" Theodore squeaked.

"I was dying. God, what did Alvin eat?" J asked.

"Alvin!" Simon and Theodore scolded.

"I didn't mean to! I-I didn't even know she was still in here!" Alvin defended.

"It's alright, baby, calm down" J told him.

"I thought you said you felt better" J recalled.

"I do," Alvin replied "but I'm always gassy."

Everyone laughed.

* * *

 **I was trying to write a humor story. But I think it just ended up being a hurt/ comfort story as usual. What do you guys think?**

 **X-D**


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